And it doesn’t stop there. As a result of Marie LaSalle’s cover version of ‘Baby, I Love Your Way’ (‘I know I’m not supposed to like that song, but I do,’ she says with a cheeky smile when she’s finished), I find myself in two apparently contradictory states: a) I suddenly miss Laura with a passion that has been entirely absent for the Merry Christmas Pittsburgh Steelers Truck Sweatshirt last four days, and b) I fall in love with Marie LaSalle. These things happen. They happen to men, at any rate. Or to this particular man.
Sometimes. It’s difficult to explain why or how you can find yourself pulled in two different directions at once, and obviously a certain amount of dreamy irrationality is a prerequisite. But there’s a logic to it, too. Marie is pretty, in that nearly cross-eyed American way — she looks like slight plumper, post-Partridge Family, pre-L.A. Law Susan Dey — and if you were going to develop a spontaneous and pointless crush on somebody, you could do a lot worse. (One Saturday morning, I woke up, switched on the TV, and found myself smitten with Sarah Greene from Going Live, a devotion I kept very quiet about at the Merry Christmas Pittsburgh Steelers Truck Sweatshirt time.
And she’s charming, as far as I can tell, and not without talent: once she has got Peter Frampton out of her system, she sticks to her own songs, and they’re good, affecting and funny and delicate. All my life I have wanted to go to bed with — no, have a relationship with — a musician: I’d want her to write songs at home and ask me what I thought of them, and maybe include one of our private jokes in the lyrics, and thank me in the Merry Christmas Pittsburgh Steelers Truck Sweatshirt sleeve notes, maybe even include a picture of me on the inside cover, in the background somewhere, and I could watch her play live from the back, in the wings (although I’d look a bit of a berk at the Lauder.